november: SLOW

"There is more to life than increasing its speed."

GANDHI

We live in a world where time is money. It is a world of fast transportation, fast food, multi-tasking and one-minute bedtime stories. The implied goal always seems to be to add more to our days, to do more and to do it faster. We have forgotten how to negotiate boredom in this technology-rich, media-saturated, multi-tasking world. This would all be fine if we were all happier and healthier because of it... but we're not. "Time-sickness," as coined so poignantly by Larry Dossey in 1982, is pervading the world; we feel as though "time is getting away, that there isn't enough of it, and that you must pedal faster and faster to keep up" until you collapse in a heap of exhaustion. Even teenagers are complaining about and even dying from burn-out. Ours is certainly a world of fast people living faster and faster lives... but why?

In the last few weeks, my life has picked up such speed that I'm starting to get motion sickness. Every day and every weekend from here until Christmas (and sadly, beyond) is booked - completely, totally booked. Most of my commitments are wonderful ones - I've embarked on a very intensive yoga training certification, I'm planning a wedding, etc - but nevertheless, the speed at which I need to live my life is nauseating. I don't remember what I've read, what I've ate, whom I've seen or what I've done... and sadly, it's hard to remember the last time I spent some quality time with friends or family. It's all just a little bit... okay, a lot... too darn fast!

And then I thought...

'Do I really need to live my life at this speed? Is there another option that might be more suitable for my life?' Perhaps there isn't. Perhaps this is how I'm supposed to drive this vehicle until the next turn in the road. But as with all months before, the point is to take nothing for granted and to try everything to determine what makes me happiest and most healthy.

That said, in no particular order, here are this month's slloooooowww resolutions:

1. Reread In Praise of Slow by Carl Honore, slowly this time.
2. Eat slowly and only sitting down at a table - a desk does not count!
3. Take a lunch break four times per week.
4. Wake up earlier but don't go to work earlier.
5. Media blackout part II.
6. Meditate... every... single... day.
7. Sunday Sabbath.

A long list, I know, but a much needed one. The goal of this month is not to become a sloth or even a tortoise, though I feel that might have its advantages; instead, I hope to find my tempo giusto - my right speed.

(Source: MetroMoms)

Thanks for stopping by! Happiest of Hallowe'ens!

mxo

cozy wednesday evening ponderings...

Hi there!

Delinquent blogger here! It seems there is a direct correlation between how busy I am and how many posts there are. We'll have to remedy that!

The blistering winds and almost bare trees can only mean that time is passing and another month is almost up. With October drawing to a close, it's time to check in.

This month's focus on financials was, predictably, quite dull. I was thoroughly bored just three weeks in and passionlessly finished off the rest. But despite this month's lackluster challenges, I will admit that they were a necessary step towards the happier, healthier me I am striving for. It's not that I have more cash in my bank account on this eve before the long-awaited monthly pay day - I do - but the value of this month's challenges was in the self-awareness they afforded me. I learned A LOT about myself by reducing my consumption and even just by tracking my daily pennies. Here I thought I spend copious amounts on junk I don't need. I spend copious amounts, but on consumables instead - food, vitamins, massages, yoga, etc. With that realization, the guilt dispersed. These aren't frivolous things to me; they are part of what makes me happy and healthy. They are the little things that keep me smiling. What other reason is there to have money than to enjoy life?

So, with October's challenges almost completed, it seems I have reached the quarter mark of this narcissistic journey. What I have learned thus far?

Well...

1. Exercise is quintessential. No one wants to hear it, but exercise is the fastest, easiest, most guaranteed way to lift your spirits and keep your ticker ticking.
2. An uncluttered home is such a wonderful thing to come home to after a less than wonderful day.
3. Finance books bore me immensely.
4. Books and naps are worlds better than TV and aimlessly net surfing.
5. Giving wakes you up to all sorts of magic.

With all that said, it's absolutely true: I am so much happier and healthier than when this all started. Still a long way to go, but for now, I pause to enjoy the destinations along the way...

As always, thanks for stopping by...

Namaste!

mxo

how do you spend your money?

Here's how the average American family spends their annual cash:

(Source: Visual Economics)

And we Torontonians:

2008 AVERAGE HOUSEHOLD EXPENDITURE

Concept	Amount ($)
Personal taxes	19,365
Shelter	18,901
Transportation	10,229
Food	8,132
Personal insurance payments and pension contributions	4,254
Recreation	4,141
Household operation	3,892
Health care	2,115
Education	2,009
Tobacco products and alcoholic beverages	1,537
Source: StatCan 2009

How do you compare? Me? Not so much. I like to spend ridiculous amounts on fancy rice milk lattes and various vitamins, it seems.

After staring at these charts repeatedly for hours, I only now realize what's missing (and also missing from my monthly spending): charity!

What would the world look like if we diverted just 5% of what we make to the charity of our choice?

mxo

the origins of stuff...

We like stuff.

We want it in bulk, and we want it cheap.

We let it define us, and make us feel bad if we don't have enough.

We like stuff... a lot.

I have spent the past month assessing just how much I like stuff and how much I'm willing to spend on it. I've contemplated what it does to the environment, how it affects what I think about myself, and where it's all going to go when I'm done with it. I haven't, until just recently, thought about where it all comes from.

This past week I started reading a great book: Factory Girls: From Village to City in a Changing China by Leslie Chang (thanks Vince!)

The book describes what our gluttonous demand for stuff has done to Chinese society. Our want for lots of stuff at bargain prices has helped create an immense population of migrant workers (some 130 million) who flee their peasant roots into cities like Dongguan to work in the factories that make our stuff. The cities are dirty and chaotic; the factories corrupt and deplorable. Workers get paid measly pennies an hour and work far too many hours. This is nothing new. However, what makes Chang's book particularly effective is how deeply personal it is. The facts are delivered through the stories of young girls, some barely 16-year-olds who voluntarily leave everything they know to work in these factories, in hopes of a better life. The picture isn't entirely grim, their stories are ripe with determination and adventure... but I can't help but walk away feeling a little... well... guilty. All of this because we want more stuff?

Then there is Fast Food Nation. Leaving aside all other issues, the movie does an amazing job of depicting the stories and struggles that go into making our stuff. It's hard not to feel incredibly guilty when you watch the tales of the Mexican migrant workers who risk their lives, and various body parts, to work the "C shift" packing meat for a major fast food chain. It's shocking.

When you start to think about stuff in it's entirety - not just how much it costs you, but also what where it comes from, where it will go when you're done with it, and who was affected in the making of it - it starts to lose it's appeal... very quickly.

That's all she wrote.... thanks for stopping by!

mxo

yoga pose of the week: tree

Happy Monday, everyone!

Tomorrow marks day one of my yoga instructor course, and I literally can't wait! I'm bursting! Since I'm going to be working tomorrow, then yoga-ing until the wee hours, I thought we'd do this week's yoga pose a little early.

This week's pose is tree (or vrksasana). It looks a little something like this:

Tree works your thighs, knees, ankles, and spine. It also supposedly stretches your chest and shoulders, though I'm not sure I've ever paid attention to that aspect of the pose. As far as postures in the hatha series goes, this is a fairly "easy" one... except when it's not.

Tree and I usually get along. In most classes, it's a welcome break from the more rigorous postures and vinyasas. I just get to stand there, pin straight, and catch my breath. However, on the days I least expect it, tree can be quite a pain in the behind (not literally; it doesn't work those muscles). The main goal of tree is balance, and sometimes that just isn't happening. Sometimes you feel like a tree in a hurricane, swaying every which way until you fall right out. This is extremely frustrating, and usually comes when you stop focusing on yourself and start looking at your neighbours - a cardinal mistake in yoga!

But even despite the occasional hurricane, I love tree pose and here's why, written oh-so eloquently by the lovely Lindsay of Kiss Me, I'm Vegan:

"I love trees.

I love how tall they try to grow.

I love how strong they are.

How straight they stand.

I love how their branches reach out like fingers spreading into the world.

I love how, despite a storm, or a hurricane, or a tornado, or a bout of lightening destroying and splitting one of their branches, they still remain rooted, they still stand up straight, they still spread their branched fingers.

I love the ebb and flow of trees - how in the cold of winter, they shed their old "skin" of leaves and flowers and bare themselves so nakedly and vulnerably in the winter air for all the world to see. How their branches grow and bud into fully bloomed arms of flowers and leaves come summertime. How they allow their leaves to evolve into bright oranges, reds, browns, and yellows come autumn, opening themselves to experience another side of life, before going naked again...

I love their persistence, their unyielding strength, their expansive growth, their comforting shade.

Their peace.

Their stillness." (Read more)

That's all for today... thanks for stopping by!

mxo

29 gifts...

So, it's more than half way through the month and I just realized I completely forgot about one of the challenges!! I forgot about the most important one!! GIVING!

A few months ago, I read Cami Walker's 29 Gifts: How a Month of Giving Can Change Your Life. The book is an autobiographical account of Walker's fight with MS and a "prescription" a close friend gave her when she was in her lowest life-hating, 'woe is me' slump. The concept is simple: give something away each day for 29 days. The gifts don't have to be grand or even material. They can be as simple as offering a smile or kind word to a stranger, but they have to be sincere.

I embarked on my own 29-day gifting challenge back in March and, as in Walker's case, the effects were profound. The challenge allowed me to step out of myself and realize just how much I have to be grateful for; it shifted my perspective completely. For the last three weeks, I have been heavily focusing on how much I have, how much I waste, etc. It's time to start thinking about how much I can give.

So today begins my 29-day giving challenge. 29 days will put me well into November but that's a-ok with me!

Happy weekend!

mxo

1000 Times...

YogaHappenings says: "Before you purchase that next item ask yourself – “will I use this 1000 times?”"

Maya says: Innnnnnnnnnnnnteresting...

my own waves...

There's an epidemic sweeping my generation, an epidemic of flirting with… dare I say… non-conformity. It seems every one I talk to recently is struggling with (or resolving) the same issues I am facing. We 20-something-year-olds are not quite sure if the societal shoe, when it comes to work, actually fits and if we want to wear it. 9 to 5, Monday to Friday, almost every week of every year for 40 more years… really? Making my way up and up some ladder I don't particularly understand, spending more time climbing than enjoying the scenery... seriously? I'm just not sure I want to look back on my life in 70 years and think, "how much better would that have been if I didn't have to spend so much time in that cubicle?" It's not that I don't like to work, I actually thrive on it, I'm just not sure I like the arbitrarily prescribed work-life structure. The balance seems off. I always seem to be chasing time, failing to keep up, because so much of my day is swallowed up by what I'm supposed to be doing.

My soon-to-be brother-in-law is a huge inspiration on this front. He's one of those people who always make you feel like you can conquer the world if you so choose. A few years ago, as a 20-something-year-old, he decided he didn't quite like the societal shoe either... and he decided to do something about it! He now has a thriving resort in Nicaragua (El Coco Loco Resort) and runs a mighty inspiring charity project (Waves of Hope). Moving away to some exotic place isn't exactly my thing, but living a life that I designed, rather than trying to fit myself into someone else's mould, is more and more becoming my thing.

I don't really have much else to say, or any profound wisdom to impart; I'm not there yet. I'm barely coming to terms with exactly how I want to live my life… and that's a far cry from actually doing something about it.

What I do know… for now… I think… is this: you have to speak your dreams out loud if you want even a glimmer of a shot at achieving them. Stay tuned.

I leave you with a short video on El Coco Loco:

Happy Wednesday!

mxo

yoga pose of the week: dancer's pose

This week's yoga pose is: eQua towel!

Just kidding! That's just my new anti-slip yoga towel. After a few near-disasters in some very sweaty classes, I deemed this a necessity and purchased it today with absolutely zero guilt.... and I absolutely love it! :)

Okay, let's get serious...

This week's yoga pose is my favourite of favourites: dancer's pose or natarajasana

(perhaps also dandayaman dhanuransana). It looks a little something like this:

(Thanks Perusals & Peregrinations)

Dancer's pose is a bow pose which involves standing on one leg, kicking the other one out and up (ideally above your head), and letting the pose open you up. The anatomical focus is pretty much everywhere: on the knees, thighs, shoulders, chest, back, lungs... you name it, it's working in this pose. Dancer's pose is an anatomical butt kick.

But that's not the only reason why dancer's pose is my favourite. I love this pose because, on the days when your body decides to keep you balanced and still, it's looks so graceful and it makes you feel like you can take off and fly. I also love the metaphor, described best by Chopra in Seven Spiritual Laws of Yoga,

"To hit the target you are aiming at, you must first pull back to a still point that is full with potential... The technology for the success in life is first to pull back to a still, quiet inner place from which you can become clear about your goal, and then act with the full power of your intention. In yoga, the bow poses remind you to dive deep within yourself to find your quiet, unbounded state of awareness. When you act from this expanded domain of consciousness, your intentions will be powerful and success will be more likely"

This is precisely what yoga is about for me - a chance to quietly pull back, regroup and reassess, and then seize my full potential... although, on somedays I just tip out of the pose, land awkwardly on the floor, and have a good laugh. That's pretty powerful too. :)

Namaste,

mxo

let there be stuff (but not too much!)

"Our enormously productive economy… demands that we make consumption our way of life, that we convert the buying and using of goods into rituals, that we seek our spiritual satisfaction, our ego satisfaction, in consumption… we need things consumed, burned up, replaced and discarded at an ever-accelerating rate..." (Victor Lebow)

On that note, I decided to attempt one week without buying any new stuff. I wanted to get a better sense of what my true needs are, and how often I'm tempted to buy something just for the sake of buying. I wanted to understand just how true Lebow's words are to my own life.

The week was, for the most part, a success. In seven days, I purchased only two things: a plastic bag and a serving dish to transport my thanksgiving goodies in. Both of these items could have been altogether avoided with better planning, but they were the more convenient option at the time. I spent under $5 on new stuff, a tiny fraction of what I usually do. My bank account is a lot healthier than it usually is at this point in the month (we get paid monthly so it's easy to compare months). My house is a little less cluttered. All good things, except that I definitely struggled this week. It turns that I don't really need anything more than I already have, but I want a whole lot more! This week was an exercise in will power and in convincing myself that I didn't really need that miscellaneous item, regardless of how deprived I feel without it.

On my most deprived days, I made a point of thinking up strategies for enjoying "new" stuff and at the same time, reducing my carbon footprint. Here are my top three ways to reducing the amount of stuff we're drowning in:

1. Invest. Think quality, not quantity. Buy pieces that outlive their perceived and planned obsolescence, and buy fewer of them.
2. Share. Borrow library books instead of buying new ones. Give away old clothes to secondhand stores where others can convert your junk into their treasures.
3. Technologize. Read the paper online. Purchase electronic magazine subscriptions. Read e-books (if you can; I'm still learning).

While I can't promise I'll be so thoughtful every week for the remainder of this happy, healthy year, I will commit to thinking a little more before I purchase. I will assess my "wants" for new stuff through these three filters first to see what I can actually do without. Somewhere between buying too much and nothing at all, there is buying just enough so you that you can enjoy the finer things in life without contributing too much to the 2,000 trees that are cleared every minute in the amazon.

Etc, etc.

mxo

gobble gobble (veggie styles!)

Thanksgiving is quickly becoming one of my favourite holidays. We didn't celebrate Thanksgiving in Poland (for obvious historical reasons), so I never grew up with the holiday, but I've got to experience many wonderful Thanksgivings with the hubby-to-be's family... and it's recently been picked up by my family as well (yay!)

Leaving aside all politics about the origins of the holiday, I love it because it has nothing to do with presents, money, consumerism, etc (at least not for us). It's about family, friends, wonderful food, and, most importantly, being grateful for all that this western life affords us.

In no particular order, my heart is bursting with gratitude for:

• My hubby-to-be. He is such a wonderful man.
• My family, and how we have all grown together.
• My new family. They are the most loving, generous people in the world.
• My friends. I can truly say I know the world's best people.
• My cat. Bundles and bundles of unconditional love.
• My house, in this lovely city. How fortunate am I to have a roof over my head, and such a wonderful one at that?!
• All of the food in my tummy and the leftovers in the fridge… and never having to worry about there being more.
• My job. It took one page of the book I'm reading to put things back into perspective.
• Etc, etc... and so much more after that.

I could not be happier.

mxo

P.S. What are you grateful for? :)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Charlie and I would like to wish all of you a happy, happy Thanksgiving!

Here is our attempt at a nice photo for you, as narrated by Charlie.

"Why is the white box making noises?"

"Oooh, leaf!!!"

"This hairdo of yours just won't do. Let's fix that immediately."

"Streeeeeeeetch"

"Oh my god, is that a leaf again?!"

"Another strrrrreetch."

To which I then said, "forget it!"

Happy Thanksgiving! :)

mxo

yoga pose of the week: savasana

I am sick. :(

It's nothing serious - just a runny nose, congested head, itchy throat and aches all over - but certainly too sick for yoga. The only yoga I've been able to do since Sunday is, well, no yoga. I read about yoga and think longingly about yoga, but that's it. :(

In light of my pathetic state, this week's yoga pose is good, old savasana (a.k.a. corpse pose) - the only yoga pose I can muster this week.

This is savasana:

(from Yoga Journal)

Savasana is usually practiced briefly at the beginning of the class, and at length at the end of a class. It is meant to be a chance for your body to soak up all of the new information it has just acquired in the last 60, 90, whatever minutes of yoga. This therapeutic pose also helps to relieve stress, reduce headaches and fatigue, alleviate insomnia, and lower blood pressure. It can be the most restorative pose of all.

Sure, it looks easy, but some days it is one of the most difficult poses. Ten plus minutes of lying still, ridiculously sweaty and exhausted, trying just to focus on your breath and nothing else - sometimes it's the very last thing I want to do! But every time I feel as though I'm suffering through it, savasana always inevitably reminds me that yoga is so much more than just a killer workout. It's about learning to be still, and resilient, however difficult it may be.

mxo