perspective...

Happy Friday!
mxo

drama & choices...

Truth: I've been struggling recently with a particular situation in my life. I've been resistant to the changes that are occurring. I've felt stuck and helpless (woe is me!). I've created drama and, not surprisingly, I've been a wee bit grumpy - okay, a lot grumpy.


And then I read this, shared by one of my beautiful friends:

There is freedom that comes with awareness. Rather than thinking we are stuck in a repetitive cycle with no escape, we begin to see that we very much play a hand in creating our lives. Whether we are aware of them or not, our behaviors and choices are ours to make.

Madyson Taylor

Sigh... but of course! The situation I'm in is not the cause of my grumpiness. It's not the source of my stress (more on stress very soon). My struggles are caused solely and completely by my resistance to the ebb and flow of life, my shitty 'tude and the way I've been behaving. Crap. I did it to myself.

BUT, here's the power in the realization, the freedom in the awareness: the only thing that needs to change for me to feel differently is me... just me!

It's amazing how much drama we create in our own lives and how much things can change when we change how we look at them... and how we respond to them!

Happy Thursday!
mxo

relish...

Tummy full of delicious dark chocolate banana treats.
Body full of post-yoga heat.
Heart full of joy.

Tonight, while I waited for my beautiful friend at an amazing new (well, new to me) yoga studio in Toronto - Breathe Yoga - I stumbled upon this:






Relish the ride, not just the accomplishments.

Matthew Sanford

 

 

 

 

 

 

The perfect reminder to read his book, Waking, which I bought, placed on a shelf and completely forgot about.

Happy Wednesday!
mxo

time...

I had the most lovely lunch date today with a good friend.
We had the most lovely conversation about time.

It seems we both realized something profound recently. Mr. Einstein said it best...

I think this is especially fitting with March right around the corner. March is the month most people in Toronto really grumble about. We're sick of winter, it's not quite spring, it's grey and damp. But it's there - we can't fast-forward through it. It's there so that winter can calmly surrender to spring. It's there so that we really, really enjoy what comes after (April... and May flowers... and patios!).

spring!

So as opposed to fast-forwarding through everything and trying to do everything at once, what can you surrender?  What can you save for another day?

My only suggestion - keep the truly important things because there may not be another day.

Kind... to yourself... please be. 
mxo

growing up and making soup...

I fell asleep reading last night. At 11pm.
This has become my new weekend routine.

A few years ago, I used to start my Saturdays at 11pm. I'd stumble into bed at 6am, praying that I'd fall asleep before the sun rose and confirmed by zombie status. Around 2 the next afternoon, I'd roll out of bed, maybe work on an essay for a few hours, and then repeat.

It was great while it lasted and I was very ready for it to end when it did.

Fast forward five years to this morning when I woke up with a slight twinge of remorse for the days that once were. I think that's natural - we all tend to romanticize the past. But whenever that happens, I let myself really stew in those memories until I remember all of the less-than-glorious aspects.

And then I quickly realize that I really, truly love where I am now. I love being a grown-up... and aging is fun! Whether we choose to mourn the past and dread aging OR we say, "that was fun, what's next?!" is totally up to us.

  

Blah, blah, blah... onto soup! :)

I made two delicious pots of soup this week. I made my mom's Sweet Potato Carrot Soup (yum, yum) AND I made a un-creamy broccoli soup (it's vegan) inspired by the most beautiful blog there ever was: Green Kitchen Stories.

 

Here is my interpretation of their recipe, my un-Creamy Broccoli Soup:

• 2 tbsp coconut oil or olive oil 
• 5 cloves garlic, finely chopped 
• 1 yellow onion, finely chopped 
• 1/4 tsp dried chili flakes 
• 2 heads of broccoli, cut into smaller florets and slice the stalk 
• 4 cups water or veggie stock to cover 
• 1 x 400 ml can coconut milk 
• 1 tbsp tahini
• Big pinch or two of salt, to taste
• 1 tsp curry powder (optional)
• 2 cups of fresh spinach (optional)
• 5-10 of fresh basil leaves (optional)
• Garnish: roasted pumpkin seeds and cilantro. 

Heat up the oil on medium with the red chili flakes and garlic until fragrant - you don't want to burn the garlic! Toss in the onion and reduce the heat so that the onion sweats (rather than being fried crisp). Cook for a few minutes, stirring occasionally. Add broccoli, cover with stock/ water, bring to a boil and then reduce to a simmer and let it cook for 20-30 minutes. Remove a few cups of the broth (you can always add it back in). Add coconut milk, basil, spinach, curry and tahini. Blend, blend, blend until creamy (hand blender is best but my food processor works well too, it's just messier). If it's too thick, add in some of the removed liquid. Cook for another 5-10 minutes. Serve with garnish. Enjoy!

It's vegan, gluten-free and totally yummy.

I froze a big jar-full for a quick weekday meal. Also, freeze the leftover water! It makes for an awesome stock for future soups. I can't wait until their cookbook hits the shelves!


Be kind to yourself!
mxo

P.S. I do wonder if we ever feel like grown-ups...

advice epidemic...

I woke on Sunday compelled to box up all of my self-help books. All of a sudden, I had this super clear sense that they were doing more harm than good. Those seemingly helpful words were actually distracting me from listening to my own inner voice.

Then today, serendipitously, I watched this:

        

Minute 14:40 on REALLY hit home.

We are suffering from an epidemic of too much advice. The internet is chock-full of articles, videos and blogs (like mine, ha) with tips and tricks on life, love, fitness, happiness - everything! The self-help business is booming - Oprah has built herself an empire on it. Most of these resources come from people honestly trying to be helpful BUT the sheer volume can be absolutely overwhelming.

Here's the thing: there's no cookie-cutter solution. We are all unique and we all need to live our lives in our own ways. You're never going to know if you're on your right path until you get so quiet that you can hear yourself think (and feel!).

Two bookshelves, packed almost exclusively with self-help books!

Take it all with a grain of salt and set a goal to regularly tune out the world. Tune inward instead. That's mine big goal for the next long while - all I'm allowing myself to read and watch is fiction. Period, of end story. :)

Happy Tuesday!
mxo

P.S. The ironies in this post aren't lost on me... :)

family secrets...

Happy Family Day!

Today's lovely, sunny day off has started with...

... lemon water
... a glorious green juice (curly kale, cucumber, celery, parsley, and a pear)
... yoga with Kathryn Budig on yogaglo.com
... 15 minutes of "time-out" (a.k.a. lying on my foam roller) (a.k.a. meditating)
... avo toast from Crazy Sexy Kitchen 

Avocado smooshed onto Ezekiel bread, topped with olive oil, sea salt and chili flakes.

...  and lots of mulling over my grandpa's way of life.
                                                                                                  
Decades ago, my grandpa figured out the secrets to health, longevity and living life well, and has been applying them religiously ever since. He'll be 84 in March and every time I hear about his recent escapades, they blow me away.

Despite the winter weather, he walks a minimum of 6km each and every single day. Then he rides his stationary bike for 30 minutes. Each and every single day. "It's the most boring 30 minutes of my day, but I do it, and then it's over". Exactly.


His tips for health are simple:

1. Never over eat, but eat everything in moderation. 
2. Exercise, always. End of story.
3. Be consistent with eating, sleeping, exercising, etc. 
4. Throw in the towel on all of the above once in awhile. On occasion, have a extravagant dinner and dance the night away (two weeks ago, he was dancing until 4am!) 

The key, of course, is to practice 1-3 regularly so that you can thoroughly enjoy 4 and not pay for it with your health. You have to work at it and you have to commit... but he's living proof that it's worth it!

My grandpa, Witek, on his 80th birthday.

So on this Family Day 2013, I am channeling the energy of my grandma yet again. :)

Be kind to yourself!
mxo

snowy quote...

It's absolutely stunning outside - white, crisp and so perfectly sunny. Days like this are why I adore winter.

SNOW!

On this beautiful day, I leave you with this gem:

We are dying from overthinking. We are slowly killing ourselves by thinking about everything. Think. Think. Think. You can never trust the human mind anyway. It's a death trap

Anthony Hopkins  
(Source: that kind of woman)

Much love,
mxo

ease...

As I was saying in my last post...




... except she said it better. :)

Much love,
mxo

life = fun (or at least it should)...

My brother-in-law is one of the coolest people I know... by far. Here's why.

Something Jamie wrote in an email last week really, REALLY stuck with me. We were chatting about the concept of following your passion. He said this:
  

"People always ask me how long I will do coco loco and I always say until I don't enjoy it anymore. 
Life is too short to waste time."

Brilliant, and far more prophetic than I think he realized. Here's the thing, it's amazing to follow your passion, assuming you know what it is, but I think it can be much simpler than that.

It's okay to just have fun. In fact, when you stop having fun, you should really consider shaking things up. 

Many of us seem to have forgotten that it's okay to be joyous, that life is supposed to be enjoyed.

Now, the caveats:

Caveat one: define fun

• Fun doesn't have to mean quitting your job and partying away all of your money and sanity. That's not very sustainable.  

Case in point: I don't love my job - as far as jobs go, it's pretty great, but it's not my "passion". Some days it's not even all that fun BUT it affords me a life that's fun. Because of my job, I can travel to see my bro-in-law several times a year. It means I can go to yoga and out for dinner dates with great friends. Etc. My job is actually one of the reasons I can enjoy life as much as I do.


Caveat two: timelines matter

• Every day is not going to be fun. We're human, we wake up on the wrong side of the bed (even in paradise). We have bad days and heck, even bad weeks and bad months. You can't judge the fun quotient of your life on too short of a time period BUT you also can't put it off forever (i.e. "when I retire..."). Watch this awesome TED Talk. You'll know in your gut what timeline is most appropriate.

There's still part of me that thinks this is a selfish approach... but a wiser part knows that that fear is hogwash. Truth is, if more of us spent more time having fun and enjoying life, this planet (or at least the morning subway commute!) would be a far happier place.

Jamie's morning commute...

I end this really, really, really long post (sorry!) with this:  you don't always have to be going somewhere or pursuing some goal. It's okay (and great!) to just be and have fun doing it!

mxo

P.S. Thanks bro!  :)

simple...

Happy Tuesday! My body is humming from another sweaty hot yoga class - what a perfect treat in the winter!

A few days ago, in the midst of an email discussion about health and happiness, my brilliant husband wrote this:

"the constant ability for humans to ignore the obvious solution staring them in the face never ceases to amaze!"

 
It's true! We do tend to ignore the obvious and we certainly don't want to hear it. Case in point:

Who wants to hear AGAIN that you should eat more vegetables, exercise and unplug?! It's just so booooring. But, alas, it's also true.

I get it. Trust me, I have looked in every nook and cranny for a magic solution but there isn't one. Health takes commitment; it takes hard work. But eventually, when you start feeling truly awesome, this hard work becomes fun! And the beautiful upside of all of this is that it's also simple - we can feel so much better just by taking small, itty bitty steps.

So, based on the Doc's prescription, what kind act can you do for yourself? What work can you put in towards your health? As for me, I need to ditch my computer!

Be kind to yourself.
mxo

just be...

I'm back from sunny paradise (a.k.a. Nica)...

... back to this:

But alas, c'est la vie.

Nica is this incredible place where I can truly let my body, mind and soul rest. It's the place where I can really connect with myself and those I'm fortunate enough to spend my holiday with. On this trip, someone said something offhandedly that really resonated:

"you can tell she just let's herself be. she just is."

Hmmm.

This culture of ours is so goal-focused, so driven, so speedily pursuing some future version of something that I think we often forget the art of just being.

How often do you let yourself just ride the subway or bus without checking your phone, reading or listening to music? How often do you just sit there and take in the ride?

How often do you have a conversation with someone when you're truly listening to them, without thinking about what you'll say next or what they might be thinking of you? How often are you just there?


I wrote about this awhile ago, but I feel like it needs to be said again (translation: I need to hear it again). But really, how often do you just let yourself be?


Once you move past the initial anxiety of not moving at 1,000 miles a minute, you might just find that there's something so beautiful in the stillness. It's actually quite joyous.

So much love,
mxo

unstuck list...

Good morning!

I woke up this morning with a bit of a hangover from last night's teary-ness. Rather than wallow, I decided to shift my energy! I decided to practice this joy business. :)

So, I got busy:

• I made the most delicious lemon and ginger elixir, and followed it up with a "Peep in My Step" juice (recipe below).
• I did my exercises and stretches.
• And enjoyed a few minutes of silence.
• I had a super healthy breakfast, and took every possible staircase I could to work.
• And now this, liquid joy:

Americano from Mercatto, made by Alice. Joy.

It's almost three hours later and I feel new. Brand new. It's that simple. :)


OH, and yes, this:

Last night I stumbled upon Robin Sharma's 62 Tips to Get Unstuck in 2013 and absolutely loved it.

Here are the top 25 that really resonated with me:

1. Start your day with 20 minutes of exercise.
2. Stop watching TV. (Bonus points: sell your tv and invest the cash in learning and self-education).
3. Remember that your diet affects your moods so eat like an athlete.
4. Spend an hour a day without stimulation (no phone+no FaceBook+no noise).
5. Write in a journal every morning. And record gratitude every night.
6. Do work that scares you (if you’re not uncomfortable often, you’re not growing very much).
7. Smile more (and tell your face).
8. Do a collage filled with images of your ideal life. Look at it once a day for focus and inspiration.
9. Plan your week on a schedule (clarity is the DNA of mastery).
10. Stop gossiping (average people love gossip; exceptional people adore ideas).
11. Do a nature walk at least once a week. It’s renew you (you can’t inspire others if you’re depleted yourself).
12. Do something that makes you feel uncomfortable at least once every 7 days.
13. Remember that to double your income, triple your investment in learning, coaching and self-education.
14. Achieve 5 little goals each day (“The Daily 5 Concept” I shared in “The Leader Who Had No Title” that has transformed the lives of so many). In 12 months this habit will produce 1850 little goals–which will amount to a massive transformation.
15. Write handwritten thank you notes to your customers, teammates and family members.
16. Use the first 90 minutes of your work day only on value-creating activities (versus checking email or surfing the Net).
17. Breathe.
18. Keep your promises.
19. Brain tattoo the fact that all work is a chance to change the world.
20. Spend more time in art galleries. Art inspires, stimulates creativity and pushes boundaries.
21. Read a book a week, invest in a course every month and attend a workshop every quarter.
22. Remember that you empower what you complain about.
23. Become the fittest person you know.
24. Become the kindest person you know.
25. Know your “Big 5″–the 5 goals you absolutely must achieve by December 31 to make this year your best yet.

Hope you can find something that inspires you this morning.

So much love,
mxo

P.S. My "Peep in My Step" juice involved apples, kale, celery, swiss chard, and lots of ginger. Yum!

love life...

mxo

Perspective

Today was a sh*t sandwich kind of a day.

I cried... a lot. I b*tched and moaned. I bailed on one of my best friends. It wasn't pretty.


But then the universe sent me this little nugget of wisdom:

"be thankful for what's right rather than complaining about what's wrong"

And this.

And this.

Trust me, I know it's hard to see the forest for the trees when you're in the muddy thick of it, but I promise you, there is a forest.

The universe has your back. Oh yes, and this: if not this, than something better.

Much love!
mxo

roasted strawberries and happy choices...

This past month has been wonderful. Really, truly wonderful.
I feel like I've really hit my stride. 
It all really boils down to a few ideas I've allowed to percolate in my mind. 

Here goes:

• Happiness is a choice.
• But it's one you need to make constantly. 
• Believe in miracles.
• And that the universe has your back. It does.
•  When all of the above fails, remember that there are always extraordinary things happening. 

Oh, and this weekend I made these: roasted tomatoes and roasted strawberries! So yum!  

Roasted Strawberries:

• One big carton of strawberries.
• 1 tbsp maple syrup.
• 1 tbsp port wine.
• 1 tsp vanilla.
• 1 tiny pinch salt.
• 1/2 tsp olive oil.

Preheat oven to 350f. Trim strawberries and cut them in half. Place them in a baking dish (not a baking sheet as the juices will drip all over your stove... messy!) Mix all other ingredients in a bowl and pour over strawberries. Give the berries a swirl so that they are equally covered in liquid. Bake for 30-40 mins. Let cool and enjoy alone, over yogurt, with granola, in a salad... YUM!



At the same time, you can also make Roasted Tomatoes!

• One big carton of cherry tomatoes.
• 2 tbsp olive oil.
• 1 tbsp maple syrup.
• 1 tbsp white wine or white balsamic vinegar.
• 1 pinch salt.

Preheat oven to 350f. Cut tomatoes in half. Place them in a baking dish (not a baking sheet as the juices will drip all over your stove... messy!) Mix all other ingredients in a bowl and pour over tomatoes. Give the tomatoes a swirl so that they are equally covered in liquid. Bake for 30-40 mins. Enjoy!

Finally, please send some love to my friends, Mark and Lynne, and help Mark heal. 

Much love.
mxo

beautiful messiness

August hit hard, so hard that it the reset button on my life. I turned 28 and a few things happened to remind me just how fleeting life really is. 

I've also started to really truly accept that life is supposed to be messy. 

My pops and I...

Somewhere along the way, many of learned/ decided/ started believing that:

• life is supposed to be neat and tidy, and
• if I only do x, or stop doing y, my life will finally be neat and orderly, and I'll be happy.

Until a few days ago, I completely subscribed to all of the above. This whole blog has been based on these ideas - if I only do more yoga, eat less gluten, run more frequently, save more money, etc, I'll find the missing puzzle piece and then I'll be happy. All of this assumed that I wasn't happy and couldn't be happy all along.

I've recently realized that that kind of thinking more often than not leads to anxiety, burn out, and generally missing the beautiful messiness that is life.

Now, after all that August was, I've been mulling this over instead:

"We think we're supposed to figure out how life should be, and then make it that way... How did we come up with the notion that life is not okay just the way it is, or that it won't be okay the way it will be? Who said that the way life naturally unfolds is not all right?"

                        ~ the untethered soul

mxo

have a ball...

More and more, I'm realizing this absolutely true:

 

Happy birthday, Lucille darling!

mxo

doing the work: coming clean...

"Until you learn to heal the wounds of your past, 

you will continue to bleed into the future."

~ Iyanla Vanzant

Oh boy! What a busy week it's been. Busy, but amazing. 

During my dinner date with one of my very best friends, I realized that despite knowing her for almost 10 years, she didn't, until Friday, know a big part about me.  

Then I realized that perhaps few people do... and really, that's just silly. It's time to share.

Here goes...

Last year, I wrote about the stories we tell ourselves about who we are.

There are a lot of chapters to each of our stories. An eating disorder is one of mine.

Like for many, junior high was essentially torture for me. I had gained a few pounds before I started grade seven, as many preteen girls do; that chubbiness, combined with my enrollment in the full time "gifted" program (an odd social experiment), essentially made me the perfect target for prepubescent torture (oh yes, I also went to band camp).

I dealt with it as I knew best - I threw myself into sports and, at the tender age of 12, I started my first diet. 

By the end of my first year of junior high, I had dwindled to a tiny size and the interventions began. I had anorexia.

Interestingly, I have blocked out most of the memories around this topic. All I know is that while I managed to heal the anorexia, my distorted and unhealthy body image has plagued me until today. In my twenties, I developed a new coping mechanism: at times pushing myself too far with exercise and always dissecting every morsel that went into my mouth. I became a pro at setting myself up for failure and beating myself up for it. Not surprisingly, I made myself physically sick.

I'm sharing this (long) story for two reasons:

• While doing my homework, I have realized that the very first step to moving forward is to evaluate where you're starting.It's essential to come clean.  

• The very act of coming clean can help others tremendously, even if it's just to know that they are not alone. That's the main point of this blog, after all: to share my journey so that it may, in whatever small way, help someone else.

Phew! What a long post! As always, thanks for reading... and happy Sunday!

Happy tumbling & stumbling!

mxo

P.S. I've moved Sabbath Sunday to Sabbath Friday/ Saturday for the next little while. I'll explain later. :)

doing the work: the living of life

When I set my mind to something, I want results and I want them now. Better yet, I want them yesterday. And I want them to be extraordinary.

When I picked up yoga again a few years ago, I wanted to do a headstand immediately.

When I started running, I wanted to run a half marathon without any training.

When I started eating well, I wanted to have glowing skin and boundless energy after my first green juice.

But here's what I've learned after a week of doing my homework: it doesn't work like that. What's more, when we are so focused on the results - awaiting that glorious moment when everything will click into place - we miss out on what might actually make it all click: the living of life.

Here's an excerpt from Geneen Roth's "Why Weight" which REALLY struck a chord this week:

I have a friend, someone I love very much, who has spent the last few years either traveling around the world or in meditation retreats. In four years, she's worked for six months, and those months were spent making enough money to leave. She reminds me of the participants in workshops who keep looking for the answer, keep waiting for the click, and all the while, miss what could be producing it for them: the living of life. Waking up, dreaming, laughing, fighting, loving, crying, sweating, sleeping - and noticing. The boredom, the sadness, the rage, hate, joy, the hunger of being alive. Notice it all. The ordinary happenings of a day.

This friend of mine keeps opting for the extraordinary in just the way we keep waiting for the magic. We keep thinking something is going to happen that will make it all make sense. And when it doesn't, my friend goes on another retreat or flies to somewhere else in the world. Just as she does, we wait. We wait.

"When is the little thing going to click that will make it all change?"

The answer is that there is no click. Or the answer is that the click is now, here. If you value the experience of getting there instead of the result of being there, one moment is just as good as the next. Learning about your hunger, tasting a raisin as if it were the first you ever ate, stopping when you are satisfied, not stopping and noticing how you feel, it's all part of the process of waking up to being alive.

Precisely.

Happy tumbling & stumbling!

mxo